Hired Help

Dear Mom,

     Its me, Tucker, the hired help. Its been a while since I have seen or heard from you. I had a minute under the shade of this tree, so I decided to write to you and Dad. Originally I signed on here just to clear counters and clean up the yard occasionally. You would be surprised how much trash my employers just leave lying around. Oh, and let me tell you about the food they just let rot. I've seen them leave a loaf of bread on the table for what seem like for ever, just to let it get moldy. I could tell from the expression on their faces that they were surprised at how fast I cleaned up for them.

      The two years Ive been here all in all have been good. I was getting let go from my previous employment when the man saw how hard of a worker I was and picked me up. He offered me a place to stay in return for yard work and some small housework. At the time there just wasn't a better offer out there. I didn't have much of a choice.

      Recently it seems the scope of employment has grown exponentially. Currently I am expected to babysit a very clinging three year old. There are only so many times I can play horse in one day. I recently was notified that there will be another small one running around to clean up after. I've also been delegated the estate security. Its a lot of area to cover alone, but I make my regular patrols walking the perimeter then moving to the inside and clearing the house.

      I really have to watch myself though. On the extremely rare occasion that I accidentally step in some mud or water and unknowingly track it into the the house they seem to always be right there. By the way they react you would think that it happened everyday. Don't ever bring a rotting potato into the house. They fly off the handle if that happens.

      Oh, and don't even think about walking down or up the stairs at the same time. They act as if they are some kind of royalty. I feel as though I need to make way for the King and Queen of England.

      Its not all bad. I think they really appreciate the company. The little one loves to play, and I enjoy a good tug-o-war occasionally too. I love when they scratch behind my ears. Though she would never admit it, I think the woman likes to have me around. I mean how could she not, after all of the help that I give her.

      Well, I gotta go. Someone is walking way too close to the perimeter fence. I think I'm gonna scare them off with the usual barking.

Love,

your puppy Tucker

PS

I'll Probably get yelled at for barking. Oh well. Its my job.